this post was submitted on 04 Nov 2024
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Their behaviour is weird and self-contradictory and drag is sick of it!

People constantly ask drag why drag uses neopronouns. And then when drag answers, they get mad about the answer. What gives!?

This person here seems nice, no shade on them, but look at the downvote numbers. Three other people upvoted their accepting comment, saying drag should be dragself. But it looks as though those same three people downvoted drag for explaining drag's pronouns. So they hate drag for being drag, but they like platitudes and symbolic gestures of acceptance. It doesn't make any sense.

Drag is wondering whether drag should even explain drag's pronouns to anyone anymore. Last week, drag got banned from [email protected] for explaining drag's pronouns. Someone asked, and drag answered their question. Drag didn't agree with the situation and made a thread on yepowertrippinbastards - https://lemmy.nz/post/15935996 - and most of the people in the thread accused drag of changing the subject to dragself and demanding others use drag's pronouns. Other people clog up the thread with demanding drag explain themselves, and it's drag's fault they asked.

Maybe drag should just ignore people who ask drag to explain drag's pronouns, or tell them no. But surely the transphobes will get mad at that, too.

Drag thinks maybe the reason they get mad when drag evades, and mad when drag complies, is because they just want a socially acceptable excuse to be mad at drag. They want to manufacture conflict so they can attack the trans person and pretend it's not about drag's transness.

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 hours ago (2 children)

Well, no, transphobia is a specific thing with a fairly well defined set of limits. You can't apply it willy nilly. Well, you can, but it not only won't achieve anything, and it waters down the term.

Go through their history, look at the comments. Any venom towards dragonrider is because of the dissonance of the terminology, not because they're trans. Which, have they even said they're trans before now? I haven't checked every single post and comment. This is the first time I've seen them mention it.

Neo pronouns aren't just a cis thing with it being confusing. Trans people get confused about it too, and some directly object to it being lumped into trans rights at all because the struggle for acceptance of established pronouns is already fraught with difficulty, and outright danger. IDGAF, though I'm not wasting my time adjusting my keyboard settings to capitalize it, or translating every single pronoun to drag. More power to anyone. But dragonrider asked something, and I gave the best response I could to it.

They genuinely seem confused why people get angry with them, and the post seemed to be wanting discussion about that. The truth is that people think drag is trolling because it's inconsistently applied, and doesn't follow grammatical structures. Regardless of what anyone thinks, you can't just redraw the grammar of an entire language and think people are going to play along.

Seriously, have you not seen drag around lemmy? The heat they're taking is directly because of the confusion around the weird choice and the explanation not matching what they write. Nobody is all "oh, you're trans, you suck, go away".

[–] [email protected] 0 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago)

Which, have they even said they’re trans before now?

https://lemmy.nz/post/15737101

the post seemed to be wanting discussion about that

Mostly wanted to vent. People are horrible.

What strikes drag about all of these comments is that they're not just mean, they're... dumb. People insisting their false memories of drag demanding they use drag's pronouns are correct. People choosing not to use their heads. People inventing fake reasons for the ban (like saying drag changed the subject to drag's pronouns) so they can still believe that attacking the trans person was justified. It never happened, but they confidently state it and get tons of upvotes. They want to believe it and so do most of the lurkers in the thread. Whatever they can fool themselves with to think that the trans person is mean and bad. Inventing a fake fight so they can make it real with their "retaliation", whether it be a man, a he/him, calling drag a narcissist...

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

i dont recall commenting if drag was experiencing transphobia or not, only that you shouldnt be the one to decide if drag is.

anybody who wants to use a set of pronouns, no matter what they are, are able to, if you spend your entire life insisting that is how you want to be referred to, then that is in no way trolling, and i dont see that from drag like you are implying. nobody is interested in using force to make you comply with pronouns, you can choose not to, but i think you should just choose not to interact with people you cant have a conversation with without getting in a semantic argument about the english language.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 hours ago

I mean, when they're expressing frustration at people responding in anger, and there's a significant portion of that anger that stems from poor grammar, I would say it's totally on topic to talk about the semantics of words, particularly when the post is inaccurately pointing towards a cause for the anger that isn't accurate, based on things people have said in the open.