this post was submitted on 07 Aug 2023
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Memes

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[–] [email protected] 51 points 1 year ago (2 children)

For real. I’d actually go back to theaters for it

[–] [email protected] 62 points 1 year ago (5 children)

I'd pay 3 times the amount of a regular ticket to watch the scene where Terry Crews, in a gorgeous ball gown, is dancing with Prince Charming, and when realizing it's almost midnight, flexes his pecs, and yells goodbye before disappearing into the night.

Prince Charming then goes around trying to find the perfect pec flex. Alternatively, bicep circumference would also be acceptable as a glass slipper alternative.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Wrong movie plot, but I would seriously watch the fuck out of this.

Edit: Get Andy Samberg as the prince and I will fight outside the theatre in a ball gown.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'm not sure that threatening to fight Andy Samberg is the best way to sign him into a movie. Then again, I don't know the guy...

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

He might be interested in checking it out. It would be the nicest gown ever worn in a wrestling match outside a theatre.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago (2 children)

You're thinking Cinderella, not Snow White.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 year ago

shhh, he's on a roll man

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago (2 children)

The one with the seven dwarves. Which opens up a lot of interesting casting choices.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Then we cast Terry Crews for the other one too.

For Snow White, we need Danny Devito, Warwick Davis, Bridget Powers, Daniel Radcliffe, Elijah Wood, Gary Oldman, and Nicolas Cage for the roles of the dwarves. For the Wicked Queen, Andy Samberg, and the mirror is Margot Robbie using the Harley Quinn voice. If Margot is unavailable, we have Tom Cruise as Les Grossman as the mirror.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Just cast Terry Crews as all of them, Eddie Murphy style

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Elijah really needs to start leaning into how fucking weird he has allowed himself to become since LotR. And I know he has a little, but clearly it's not enough.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

If you haven't seen Wilfred, watch it NOW. It's amazing. It gets weirder and weirder towards the end. It's absolutely fucking amazing.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Will do, thanks brother

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Boban Marjonovic plays all 7 dwarves

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

White Chicks II: Bro White

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)

How about this: Prince Charming tries to kiss the sleeping Snow White, but she wakes up and beats the hell out of him then lectures him on consent.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I'd watch that. But there should be a really good musical number called "Everything is rape without consent" or something... It probably wouldn't be appropriate for the target audience, but yes I agree with the point you're making: Snow White & Cinderella are way fucked.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago

Cinderella would be the prince going around with barbells trying to find the princess (Terry) who can lift them. Only he can carry the prince down the aisle.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I haven't seen a single Live Action demake but this would be my first for sure

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

demake

Someone give this guy some gold... wait where are we... I applaud your genius.