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To quote a great poet, a haiku:
ha ha ha ha ha
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
ha ha ha fuck you
Beautiful
I must obligingly credit the great MiddleAgeRiot, who should really get over to the fediverse already: https://twitter.com/middleageriot/status/1666969837988356096
He's on bsky, if that helps @middleageriot.bsky.social
Fuckin finally. So, so tired of every white collar shitbro being afforded every opportunity to keep being a shitstain.
Everyone from fuckin SBF to Donald Fuckin Trump.
Stop glad handing these pricks and treat them like you would any other criminal, worthless fucking "justice" system.
Regular ass people can be beaten and arrested based on cops getting the wrong person, and then when you justifiably "resisted" because you're fucking innocent, it means you'll have "resisting arrest" charges following you the rest of your fucking life.
Yet these pricks can make calls about when they'll turn themselves in.
fuck this fucking guy so hard. The fact that he's been able to UP UNTIL NOW spend all his time in the lap of luxury in palo alto is a disgrace.
He was living in a house his parents bought with money laundered from user deposits that he stole. His parents are paying his lawyers with that money, too.
Dudes a moron. All he had to do was sit at home and do nothing.
Just goes to show Sammy is nothing more than a techbro.
This is the best summary I could come up with:
FTX co-founder Sam Bankman-Fried (SBF) has been on house arrest in California since December while awaiting trial on fraud and money laundering charges over the crypto exchange’s collapse, but today he was sent to jail, as first reported by Inner City Press.
Judge Lewis A. Kaplan ordered the former billionaire remanded after prosecutors pushed to have his bail revoked, citing violations that included Bankman-Fried’s admitted usage of VPN software that he said was to watch an NFL game and the judge’s view that he had attempted to tamper with witnesses “at least twice.”
Docket entry from Friday’s Bond Revocation Hearing:
The witness tampering covered Bankman-Fried sharing documents used in a New York Times article reporting on diary entries written by Caroline Ellison, the former co-CEO of Alameda Research and SBF’s ex, who has already pleaded guilty and is cooperating as a witness against him.
The other incident covered Bankman-Fried’s attempts in January to contact FTX general counsel Ryne Miller over email and the encrypted messaging platform Signal.
I'm a bot and I'm open source!
I can't believe these ethical altruists are so amoral. Wow
Sam Bankman-Jailed!
Sam Bankman-Deepfried
I’m confused. What is the connection between using a VPN and witness tampering? Anyone care to explain?
They're both violations of the conditions of release. Two separate violations, unrelated except for being prohibited behavior.
is VPN prohibition a general condition of these situations or was this specific to this case? And can you clarify why using VPN violations? Sorry I’m daft on the legalities of this.
It would be a general bypass of monitored internet connectivity. One of his conditions was monitored internet access. VPNs are almost always encrypted, which bypasses said monitoring.
Sounds like they're two different violations to me
You don't get to be a billionaire by paying for NFL Sunday Ticket. Embrace hustle and grind culture!
NOOOO WHAT ABOUT THE EFFECTIVE ALTRUISMINOS? WHO WILL WE TURN TO ENSURE TRILLIONS OF IMMORTAL CYBER GODS SMILING BACK AT US IN THE FAR FUTURE? 
sam bankrun-fraud
Maybe he can bring some effective altruism to his cell mates.
LOL. LMAO.
I had no idea that VPN usage was controversial. I had to use them for work in the past. I just assumed that private parties would be using them eventually.
It’s only controversial if your online life is being monitored as a condition of bail. The VPN gets around the monitoring.
RIP BOZO
boo hoo, said nobody
I know that our incarceration facilities are inhumane but would be lying if there wasn’t a bit of ugly schadenfreude I feel knowing he’ll be in one of the most notorious places in the whole system. No kiddie gloves
