this post was submitted on 23 Aug 2023
658 points (95.9% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

26659 readers
3911 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
all 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 60 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Ah yes, the all time classic India Johns

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

It's like Papa Johns, but from India

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

Imbiamba jombes

[–] [email protected] 56 points 1 year ago (1 children)

HP will remotely lock down the purse if the volume of sauce gets too low or you have any other brand.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Or 7 days before the 'best before' date expires

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

There's a best before date?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

That's a good question

For sauce, yes.

For inkjet cartridges, I don't know, but, technically speaking, these cartridges get dry after the first time of use and their 'needles', that spray ink, become dirty. I had a bad luck washing the spraying mechanism after that.

EDIT: I don't know about the laserjet toners.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

LaserJet toners are not liquid at all, so they don't dry out. They're just powdered plastic particles that are attracted to static electricity created by lasers on the paper and are melted to the paper with a heated drum. Aside from energy use, laserjets are far superior to inkjets.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Good point! I was totally focused on the superior brown sauce

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I'm calling print cartridges HP Sauce from now on. Or, I would, if I had an inkjet or a HP, but that's showbiz baby.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Forgot the kitchen sink, but otherwise very accurate.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Dog Gambit, I knew I forgot something.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Nice username

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Dog gambit 💀

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 year ago (2 children)

I was with you on the Clue until I saw it was the Big Bang Theory Edition.

Get with it, ladies. Classic Clue is where it's at.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Isn't there an India Johns edition of Clue?

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Also:

  • A logarithmic slide rule
  • A Pythagoras puzzle game
  • Print version of the GNU general public license
  • IBM punched card with friend's phone number on the back side
  • Bootable flash drive with Hannah Montana OS
  • A grape
  • A model of a particle accelerator
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

A bootable Linux USB is legit a nice thing to have in your bag - it being Hannah Montana is just the icing on the cake. I've got one in my handbag (not HM though). No GNU license card but does creative commons count?

...it's more of a conversation starter than an actually useful thing but, y'know. Hannah Montana Linux. Useful for pranks if anything

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 year ago

Well, at least they got the piece of string right but… No tissues, no nail clipper and file? No band-aids, disinfectant, eye drops, sugar lumps, lip balm?
Anyway, judging by the weight of my hand bag the curling rock definitely IS somewhere at the bottom but I can't find it. There must be a secret pocket…

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Worcestershire, but otherwise yeah.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Unless you’re from Sheffield then it’s Henderson’s.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago

I've always been more of a thallium kind of gal.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

As I am currently living in Botswana, the constitution hit home for me.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Slide lube instead of guitar picks?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Where's the NetComm IG6000 Industrial Dial-up Modem?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Oh, I just use Colorado, you know?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Why do people like you feel the need to jump in with these kinds of unnecessary parasitic comments? Totally asanine bullshit. You should grow up and realise that, in this day and age, there is literally no excuse for a modem that doesn't support V92 to be in any handbag.

This message brought to you by the Raymay HIDEX IGM Mark II Gang.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Rubber ducky remote explosive

So they are Klee mains, right?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's totally a Hitman reference.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Specifically, the shown rubber duck item is the remote explosive rubber duck mk II, first seen in hitman 2.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Signature mkII look

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Dodoco goes on the bag, not in it silly

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Ah, I was hoping for the panel De Rechtvaardige Rechters (The Righteous Judges), but alas

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

The Thing, also known as The Continuum Transfunctioner

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Several wads of used tissues.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Thule, a mythical region in Scandinavia

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Too restrained for a purse. In the pockets of my cargo pants: seeds, flowers and twigs. Bits of string. Plastic electric fence thingies.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

See my post history for my EDC.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What a great idea it is to put a vintage stand up joke from 1982 in meme format!

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

I don't think they had Big Bang Theory themed Clue in 1982.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

As a tromboner, you keep a spare pair of lips in the bag.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I L O V E S P H E R E C O L L E C T I O N

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

.

S̴̨̢̧̡̢̧̧̢̨̢̨̧̧̛̛̱͓̗̳͉̺̹̪̙͔͎̥̖̲̻̹̱̠̱̦̫̭̩̞̯̙̙̺̟̮͚̲̦̰̮̲̗̥̗̭̫͍̹̖̺̭̝̻͇͖͍͍͍̪̤͍͔̩̞͔̜̜͕̗̭̱̘͎̝̟͓̜̖̦̼̬̤̤̬̦̟͖̙͍̬̘̫̜͚̲͉̣͔͙̠̠̝̪̦̞̭̼͓̜̫̥̯̠̼̳̞̳͂̿̂̾̓̽͒̽̌̇̎̀́̇̓̀̂̒̔̃̌̄͗̇̐̓̌̑͂͗̑̈̎̊̇̍͌̍̆̐̉̅́̆̿̑̇̓̐̽́̂̐̈̇̐̕͘͜͠͠ͅP̴̨̡̧̡̡̢̢̡̘̖̮͓̖̖̦̞̲̰̯͓̞̠̫̹͈̼͙͙̖̮̙̻̘̠̞̭͎̦̲͈̦͔̱̫̞̲̘̰͓̞͇͖͚̻͖̣͉̦̫̤̣̟̜̪̠͙̪͍̗̳̟͉͖͉͖̯͍̜͖̫̙̱͍͎̈̒̐̈́̍̎͐͑̍̒͑̽̾̀̐̃͂̃̾̓͒͂̓̓̓̏̈̾̓̍̒͂͗́̋̑͛̆͗͛͑̎̽͊̽̋̀̎̎͋̊̐̈́̋̓̄̋͛̅͌̍̍̏̾͌͐̅̌̀̋͆̂̀́̂͗̾̐̏͛̒̕̕̕̕̚͜͜͝͝͝͝͝͠͝͠ͅH̶̡̧̧̧͇̜͚̤͖̭̠͇̻̱̼̬̥̜̯̜͙̞̤͉͇͔̫̯̮̗͍̣̯̱͙̻͔̺̣͍̥̜͕͇̫̹̳̜̖̰̩̥̫̦̥̃͋̌͂̔͜͜ͅĘ̸̡̧̧̡̡̨̨̧̛̛͇̥̦̜̖̫̼͙̳̗̯̞̬̗̞̹͕̦̮̯͎̖̺͓̼̰̙͉͉͖͇̜̪̮͙̺͖̙̘̮͈̺͓̝̙͙̖̙̟̳̖̖̤̲͔̮̘̲̻͔͈͙̟̮͇̝̜̱̯̫̻̥̭̮̣̗͕̠̜͔͙̬͕͔̖͓̫͇̲̰͚̞̞̙͖̬͙̱̝̦̪̠̣̐͆̽͋̍̆̊̍̊̔̓̾̀͌̏͑̓̄͊̒͒̑̓̎̑̀͑̍̾̈͊̊̈́̀͋̑̏́́́̈́̆̅̽̈́͋̽̂̈́̈̾̆̐͐̍͐͐͛̃̀͑͌͛̆̈́̊̀̏̆̑͌̓̀͛͘̚̕̕͜͜͜͜͜͜͠͝͠͠͠Ŗ̵̨̨̢̢̡̛̛̛̭̖̝͙̹͚̗̹̜̙͈̜͕͇̻͔̻̥̘̺̜̺͖̳̲͉̰̙͎̯̰͙̯̜̘̹̦͙̻̺̤͓̖̱͖̤̝̩̩͕̱̭̟̝̣̗̜͍̟̘̰̺̳̯͍̠̞̲̪̻̺̦͉͓͕͕̑̈́̿̓́͐̄́̆́͛̅̅̀̿̒̈́̏̅̎̔́͛̑͋̓͌̉͛̋̋̅̆̇̂̿͆̍͑̍͌̾̇̄̓̀̈́̓̓͛̈͒̊̎̎̓̃͂͊̐̍̽͂̇͋͛̂͊̔̇̇̅̎̕̕̚̕͘͘͜͠͝͝͝͝͝͝ͅE̷̢̡̧̛̛̛̟̘̰̣̠̖̟̲͓̣̤̰͚̜̺̲͙̝͖̮̟̼̔͌̓̐̈́͐̔̀̍̀̒̓̃͌́̈́̍͐͐͗̋̓͆̀̏͆̽͆̇̿͂͑̂͋́̌̿̐̌̂̾̀̾̏̄͆̌̿̃̏̍̈́̄̈́̅̓̍̍͛̒̌̂̋̆͗͘̕͜͠͠͝

.