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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/bruhgubgub on 2024-10-20 04:08:19+00:00.
Costco hand cut pineapple is so good I bought 2 containers just because I knew I'd eat a whole one in a day now I'm on the toilet as I write this with my 4th liquid diarrhea shit today oh and also my asshole is bleeding AND IVE JUST DISCOVERED SKID MARKS IN MY UNDERWEAR
My girlfriend warned me not to eat so much, as I was eating the final piece. I knew I had some diarrhea on the horizon but that is just my regular morning. This is no regular morning. I am currently mourning as I look down and everytime I fart it feels as a shotgun blast has just cometh out of my ass, I was unaware of these consequences I did not believe I would be here with a raspberry chocolate starfish.
Everytime I wipe I am reminded how good the pineapple is I do not regret my choice, I might even do it again
I do wonder how much longer I will be in agony as this is the worst I've had it. My underwear has cartoon ghosts on it, I've began to wonder if I'll be joining them
TL;DR:
I ate a bunch of pineapple and my ass is bleeding and it hurts