This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.
The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/TopCow9933 on 2023-10-07 03:58:26.
My son is in the 5th grade and he recently had to testify in court over something that happened when he was 8. The whole ordeal has been traumatic for him. His mom/my ex has made the situation worse by making it all about her.
Very long story short, no one in our immediate circle knew about this until this week. My son's teacher mentioned how Eli hasn't been himself. Usually he's talkative, social, silly but can focus when he needs too. I told her he's going through something temporarily and we're aware and working on it. That's all she needs to know. In no way was he disruptive or causing trouble.
I guess that piqued her interest so she asked my ex who told her everything. No one, no one, at his school knew until then. Instead of keeping this information to herself, his teacher asked him to stay at recess to talk to him AND another teacher was in the classroom. His teacher said she knew what was going on, loved him and would be there for him and gave him a hug.
He came home so angry that I had to hold him back. We all do therapy and our therapist suggested that we allow our son to tell his teacher how he felt. His mom got hers and agreed to let me handle Eli's school year.
We met with his teacher and I explained that my ex had no business telling her about my son's personal business and how his teacher had no business letting him know that she knew. She should had asked if it was okay to offer her support. His teacher said it was regretful and she told no one else.
I said but you had another teacher in the room. She explained she had to. You can't be in a classroom alone with one kid. She said that teacher wasn't even listening. I said you don't get it. I told her I was tired of debating her and my son wants to tell you how he feels.
My son looked at her and said "I hate you so much and I hope you die." It was brutal. I didn't say anything. The teacher apologized again. She said she wished she could do it over. I said then we should have him go to Mr. D's class (the other 5th grade teacher). She didn't want to do that because she "really wanted Eli" in her class. I said, no, you just don't want the principal to know what you did.
She and I agreed to ask for the switch on the basis that we have a legal conflict of interest that we cannot discuss. The other teacher couldn't care less swapping one student out for Eli.